"While Jesus was still talking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, wanting to speak to him. Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.”
He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”"
Families are tricky institutions, aren't they? The older I get, the more I realize how blessed I have been to have a great family, but also the harder it is to let it go as it begins to change. I've begun to think about the holidays this year, and my family will be quite different this year than it has ever been...we are missing one very central person, we will have added two more people through marriage by then, and all my aunts who I love are beginning to become grandmothers to their own families which means they won't necessarily be joining ours this year. My sentimental, little heart has a hard time with this change. The picture of "the holidays" that I have cherished is going to look a little different this year.
Family is a big deal in our culture, too. Oh, Hollywood...they portray holidays as the happiest of times with everyone smiling around the table and loving one another as Jesus would. But as I speak with friends dear to me, I come to understand that all families go through change: relationships get severed; people get mad; siblings marry and go see in-laws. It's part of life. I appreciate the movies that aren't afraid to show those parts, too.
More than ever this year, I have come to understand what Jesus is talking about in these few verses. A few years ago, I was so confused as to why He would seemingly "dismiss" His own mother and brothers. At one point during His ministry, His mother and brothers thought He was a little crazy because of what He was saying and doing (Mark 3:20-21). How incredibly hurtful that must have felt to Jesus. Yet, Jesus didn't hold His earthly family up as His "everything" (as I did a few years ago). I'm sure he was thankful for His family and He loved them, but the point of life is not our family, dear friends...it's Christ and His Kingdom.
I grieved over the loss of what my family used to be. Don't get me wrong, I still LOVE my family so much, but I am having to let go of what I always thought it would be in order to embrace this new thing that God is doing with us. And in the process of letting go of the tight hold I had around my idea of "family," I have also been able to experience "family" in a whole new way -- through the family I choose in my friends and other loved ones at my church. This year, Josh and I spent Easter dinner with a couple in their 70s and two couples in their 50s...none of which are related to either Josh nor I through blood. The waitress thought we were all related -- three generations at one table -- but we technically weren't. But it was lovely! I LOVE these dear people just as they are family, and I'm learning so much through them and their experiences which are different from my family of origin. And my sisters and I are very close, but I also have had some very DEEP experiences and conversations with dear girlfriends that leads me to believe they are as much my family as my blood family -- I would do ANYTHING for them! What a gift! I don't have to just have my blood family, I can have even more deep relationships. That's an ever greater blessing!
I challenge you today to think about who your "mothers and brothers" are on this earth. I pray you have people who may even love and challenge you more than your blood family. It is such a GOOD thing to be in relationship with all types of people -- may we not be so comfortable with the idea of staying close with only our blood family.
And if you don't feel close to your blood family today, all the better! He doesn't speak about the core family nearly as much as He speaks about the generations! He sees the big picture family. Jesus doesn't hold blood family up as being better than our family in Christ. So get to know some of them. Find that Jesus provides for your needs in relationship through His Church. They may not come to you, but you can reach out to them. We all need people, don't we?
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