In the hustle and bustle of our jobs and trying to stay on top, our electronic devices that we willingly allow to bombard us with images, needs, alerts, and celebrity drama, our family lives that consist of shuffling kids from a lesson to a practice to a tutor, our marriages that have gone from two ships passing in the night to no marriage at all, and a volunteer schedule that constantly asks us to do more, it's no wonder we are feeling more stressed than we ever have.
We are more busy, but less productive...in most areas of our lives. Or at least, that's how I'd begun to feel in the past year.
I don't want to speak for you, but if you're willing to stop for five silent minutes alone -- no TV on, the phone is turned off and put in another room, no music playing (I know, you might forget what that even sounds like, and it might be a little scary) -- just you in a chair for five solid minutes of pure silence and solitude, I think you might discover what I've discovered.
I'm exhausted.
For me, the problem is busy-ness. Being busy makes me feel needed and important. So, I jam my schedule full of things that will keep me busy. That's my problem.
Running from one meeting to another, from one coffee date to another, and from one church activity to another makes me feel that I have worth. (Because for me as a teacher, I know my worth won't come from the amount of money I make and as a married but child-less woman, I know my worth won't come from my kids and their cuteness or success.) So, for me, I stay busy. For you, it might be for money or for your kids or for the next promotion. There's something that dangles your worth in front of you, but you will never catch it. It's elusive. But yet, we all keep trying to grab hold of it anyway. And in the meantime, we are really, really, REALLY busy.
Where is the place for silence, solitude, and rest? Well, perhaps they're not really needed.
Take a look at our society, too. It echos the idea of more is better -- more gadgets, more information, more busy-ness. "Everyone" has a Facebook account. "Everyone" has Twitter. "Everyone" watches reality TV and various shows that are popular right now. "Everyone" keeps their kids' schedules full. "Everyone" works seven days a week. And I don't say this to point fingers at everyone else, because I'm guilty of it, too. I have Facebook, and Twitter, and an iPhone, too.
But, something is missing. Why do I never feel quite ready to head back to work on Mondays and do it all over again for another week, just like the week before?
It's because every day is just like the rest. And I have no rest.
So, this year, 2013, I am going to rest. I'm going to have a Sabbath.
Not just sleep, but rest (which might include some sleep, too).
I am going to take God up on Commandment #4. I am going to "Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy."
Isn't it funny that it starts with the word Remember? It's as if God knew that this would be the one we'd most easily forget. I don't forget to not murder any one, but I do forget to Remember the Sabbath.
God invites us to rest for a whole day every week, to do whatever it is that revives our soul and draws us closer to Him -- guilt-free. I can promise you, He doesn't mean one more day at the office.
Now, if you're a pastor, then Sundays are not your day of rest, but pick a different one -- Saturdays or Mondays -- because pastors need to rest the most after a week full of caring for others.
Just before the holiday season, I actually did this for two weeks in a row. Just two. Those two Sundays were two of the absolute best days of all of 2012 for me.
On those two Sundays, I did go to church in the morning and enjoyed time worshiping God surrounded by people I love of all different ages who want to love God more, too.
I also had lunch afterwards with dear friends and/or family who are in my inner-circle. They are people who I don't have to compete with, but people who want to encourage us and we them. We enjoyed the flavors of wonderful food together and took our time at the table.
One of those Sundays, I went home and read in front of the fire place for a couple hours (magazines, a book, the Bible) then went for a walk with Josh and our dog, Marty.
The other week, we watched a football game together, and it was perfectly okay to feel the heaviness of my eyelids and give into it as our cat slept in my lap.
One of those evenings, we watched a movie and ate popcorn for dinner (with a glass of wine). The other evening, we sat on the couch together and just talked for three hours...something, I'm sad to say we hadn't made the time to do in our own home for a good year or more!
It was incredible. Both of my Sabbaths were the most energy-giving days of the year. I felt rested and ready to take on another week, feeling giddy that I'd get to do this all over again the next Sunday.
And, I connected more with the ones I love than I had done in a long time. I connected with God, with Josh, and with loved ones in a way that was deep and life-giving. And I realized, this is what it is all about. I had been absolutely terrified to be in a completely quiet house for more than five minutes, and for the first four minutes, it felt a little strange. But then, as I sunk down in the chair, took a deep breath, and realized that the world doesn't really need me today (or any day), a weight was lifted that I had been carrying for the past five years...or more. I can rest. And this is good.
In my quest to understand the Sabbath better, this month, I read an incredible book by Matthew Sleeth, MD (a former ER chief turned author and non-profit creator) called 24/6 where he talks about what it means to take God up on the offer of a weekly Sabbath. Really, the Sabbath is a command -- one of the ten -- but it's not meant to be a difficult one to bear. It truly is a gift from God -- He commands us to stop. Just stop. Just stop for a day, and look in a new direction, away from labor and work. The book is absolutely incredible! It's a quick, easy read full of wonderful stories/examples as well as practical advice. I cannot recommend it enough to you.
In this book, Sleeth reminds us that if the average person lives to be 70 years old (and God commands us to rest 1 of every 7 days) that would mean that 10 years of our 70 years on this earth are meant to be Sabbath rest! TEN YEARS OF REST!
So what happens, he says, when we miss 10 years of something -- of eating, of exercising, of sleeping? There will be dire consequences. And so it is without a Sabbath. Just look around us -- little relationship, little sleep, little peace and much stress, much anxiety, and much separation.
Sabbath is a gift from God to us, meant to give us rest, connection, restoration, and pleasure. But God also knows that without it, we will not be the best that He intended us to be. In fact, without rest on a Sabbath, we are not only disobeying what He has commanded, but we are also missing out on some of the greatest moments of our lives.
So, this year on Sundays, I will not be on my phone, or Facebook, or Twitter. I will not be grading papers (I'll have to get that done on the other six days). I will not be shopping at the mall (because consumerism will kill the peace of Sabbath in an instant). I will not be watching my normal TV shows (but a football game, well, nothing helps me to sleep faster).
This year, on Sundays, I will be worshiping with my church, eating flavorful foods, drinking some wine, laughing with my family, sleeping in a bit, talking with Josh about how we're really doing, walking through our neighborhood with Marty on the leash and Josh by my side, listening to God as I silently sit still before Him, renewing my mind with the reading of Scripture in our sun room, sitting a little longer after a meal, jogging on the Monon trail and soaking up the beautiful trees and the smell of fresh air, thinking about what I really want to focus on that week, and resting from work (whatever work is to me in that season of life).
What about you? What would you do with a whole day that revolves around rest, peace, pleasure, a little solitude and a little community? What does a day without work look like to you?
This will require some intentionality and some planning ahead, that's true. But I wonder if those of us who take God up on the gift of a Sabbath will look back at 2013 as the year I started really living.
“Remember to observe the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. You have six days each week for your ordinary work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath day of rest dedicated to the Lord
your God. On that day no one in your household may do any work. This
includes you, your sons and daughters, your male and female servants,
your livestock, and any foreigners living among you. For in six days the Lord made the heavens, the earth, the sea, and everything in them; but on the seventh day he rested. That is why the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and set it apart as holy." Exodus 20:8-11
Molly Monroe
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